Najois

” I often think how I really want to see you again. I should’ve run into your arms when it was appropriate.”, he said.

I won’t lie, it took me a long time to digest these words. I sat down, then walked up and down in my home, like a rocket shot into the universe.

Then everything came back. I had forgotten everything.
Reminiscent of how hurt I felt when I left. I didn’t even turn back to look into his eyes and greet him for a last time.
A pain so deep that I couldn’t even manage to think about what had happened. So I buried it deep down.

When he said those words, I felt so much at the same time that my thoughts couldn’t follow. A moment of stand still that the meditating sages describe as being.

He sent me a picture of the skies he went to see. I loved it and told him that, to me, it looked like the exact moment before conception. The spermatozoid going towards the egg, to be fertilized.

“Your intuition is scary. This is actually a nursery of stars.”

I put down my phone and went outside for a walk. He was the first person that made me feel what love is. That calm tranquil moment before conception.